Our beliefs help shape our identities, but do some of these beliefs hold us back?  Recently I have been trying to help a friend come to terms with the here and now of a diagnosis of a chronic illness and it really got me to thinking about my own beliefs.  I have had people ask me why I do what I do in regards to my sporting endeavours.  I have never really had an answer to that question and it made me think about my beliefs around my life.

If I am honest with myself and get right down to the nitty gritty, the reason I continue to strive for goals is probably the belief that one day I won’t be able to do all the sports that I want to.  That physically because of my MS there will come a day when all that is gone.  But is that a bad way to think?  I’m really not sure, but I do know that there are people out there that because of their beliefs,   negative beliefs, this will impact their lives. Things like: I’m not good enough, I can’t be happy and successful at the same time and the big one – I won’t try that I’m afraid to fail.   It’s easy to believe these thoughts because we have probably been doing it for so long, but it isn’t okay to keep believing them.

We have to try to turn those negative beliefs into positive ones and become the person we are meant to be.  Instead of relying on past negative experiences that may have shaped those beliefs you have to try and reverse them.  Switching those beliefs can give you energy and competence to try something new.

Getting back to that friend I have been trying to help, they were looking at the past and wishing it was the present or that they could get back to that same time.  The belief in their head was that they wouldn’t be able to succeed in anything living with this chronic illness and they wanted their old life back.  Unfortunately their old life is exactly that, their old life.  But life goes on and there will be a whole new world out there to tackle.

It’s like my life, I wouldn’t go back and change my diagnosis of MS because it has made me the person I am.  It has also given me opportunities that would have never come my way if it hadn’t been for my MS.  Yes it has had it’s negatives but I chose to focus on the positives and have tried to constantly have positive beliefs in myself and my abilities to tackle anything.  When I got rid of those negative beliefs I realised that I could handle this life.  I have realised that I deserved to be happy and having positive beliefs gave me the competence to try anything that I wanted to.

As for my friend, I am happy to say that they have started to change their beliefs, but it won’t happen over night and it will be a whole new way of looking at their life, but they have taken that first step.  Remember that your value is not in what you try to be or in what you pretend to be, your value is in who you are through your beliefs.

 

 

 

 

About the author : CarolC

4 Comments

  1. Aviva 09/04/2013 at 9:35 am - Reply

    Fantastic entry Carol! I’ve had similar reflections of my own life at various points and I know for a fact that those times I focus on the negative beliefs are those times that I create more negative and exert energy holding onto what I wish may have happened, could of happened or should have happened.
    I told myself a long time ago, that anytime I was fearful, I had to ask myself what I had control over and what I didn’t have control over. And anything I had no control over I would surrender to god, the universe or my angels – whoever you believe in, to take care of because it would be pointless for me to spend any minute more worrying about it when I had no control anyway. I found that as soon as I surrendered, and let go, things flowed and positive experiences came my way.
    Like attracts like, and the more you focus on the bad, and feel a victim, the more those experiences happen. It’s what you are focused on and what you see inevitably.
    There’s a fantastic documentary called “Happy” and ” ” which are worth a watch, about beliefs and people striving for happiness.
    I can’t say that I can even imagine or dare to say I know how it feels to face a health issue on the level you have or your friend. However I do offer my understanding of trauma and life struggles that I have experienced and how I have and still do get through them. That’s why I loved this entry. It really resonated and I totally agree with your outlook.
    Like I’ve said before, you are a truly inspirational woman and just know you’ve at least touched 2 people here, if not the thousands and thousands more I know you have too.
    Keep on being you – it’s amazing!

    • CarolC 09/04/2013 at 10:13 am - Reply

      Thanks you so much for your comments! I will certainly keep on being me, but I am also inspired by the new people that I keep meeting like you and Maya. I will have a look for those documentaries you mention. Continue on your own journey with the positiveness that you have and all your dreams will come true!

      • Aviva 05/05/2013 at 8:36 am - Reply

        Awww, thanks Carol! We will, and ditto 🙂 I hope you know the impact you have on people’s lives… and on ours. It’s rare to meet such grounded, victorious, determined and kind people like yourself. You keep it up too <3

  2. Aviva 09/04/2013 at 9:38 am - Reply

    I forgot to give the name of the documentaries lol….

    1. Happy
    2. Thought Exchange

    🙂

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