Living Authentically

Are you being true to who you really are or are you being someone that you think you should be to appease others?

After choosing a career path and following that for 14 years I decided it wasn’t what I wanted in life.  It was hard for my father to accept that I didn’t want to make policing a lifelong career, as he and his father had.  But he supported and respected my decision.  Yes I missed working with the lifelong friends that I had gained but they are still in my life, well at least the important and authentic ones are. 

I think a lot of people really have no idea who they truly are because they have been doing what they were taught as young children to be or do.  Too many people have chosen paths to follow in the hopes that those goals they set long ago are right for them.  If you have chosen a path and it turns out it’s the wrong one, you will have been pursuing goals that don’t really reflect who you are, what you are good at or even what you care about.

Being authentic simply means embracing who you really are, at your very core, and acting in accordance with your own values and beliefs.  It also means just being there for yourself, making sure you stick up for yourself when things get tough.  If you are being authentic your self-worth and self-confidence improve and any goals you set, you will most likely achieve.

If you’re not sure if you are being authentic take the time to sit and reflect on your life.  Be honest about what you want out of life.  Ask yourself what brings you happiness and be even more honest by acknowledging those things that don’t!  Those things that maybe you do because others want you to do.  You have to stop people pleasing and start ‘you pleasing’, do those things in life that provide joy and happiness to yourself.

This is hard to do in our society today because we don’t want to be seen as self-absorbed or selfish.  It’s not being selfish, it’s being who you truly are.

So how do you live authentically?

  • Stop trying to be someone you aren’t

  • Set a goal to do something that you truly want to accomplish

  • Step back and consider all the things you have managed to accomplish in your life and be proud of them.

  • Stay connected with your genuine friends

  • Everyday tell someone you appreciate them

  • Have the courage to say No to things and people not serving your authentic self


“Be yourself – not your idea of what you think somebody else’s idea of yourself should be.”

– Henry David Thoreau

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My new book The Force Within

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Escaping the Real World